Curiosity Is a Leadership Superpower: Great Leaders Ask Questions
Ramp Up the Ask
The operating default
From kindergarten through graduate school, we’re trained to seek out the answers; to explore enough to develop our point or view and decide on the best solution. That is what we're supposed to do. We become experts in something and are promoted for that expertise. All of that ladders up to asking questions that help us formulate an opinion followed by giving advice. And interestingly… with that approach, there’s actually very little deep listening, if any at all.
Of course, your expertise is hard-won, and we’re not advocating that you simply throw it out. But there’s also an important leadership skill that many of us forget: knowing when to stop talking, stop formulating your own opinion, and simply start asking questions and listening.
There are real costs to always being directive, or providing advice.
- People stop thinking for themselves. If you always have the answer waiting, they’ll stop doing the work of finding their own.
- Advice is almost always under-informed. You don't know their context as well as they do.
- Advice-giving subtly undermines confidence and ownership. Their solution, found through your questions, is one they'll own. Your solution, handed to them, is one they have to go along with.
- You become the bottleneck. If you want your employees empowered to act on their own, giving them advice doesn’t get you there.
It is almost never too late to offer advice, but very often too early.
The case for curiosity
Curiosity does four things at once — for you and for the people you lead:
Opens possibility
Instead of narrowing toward the answer, curiosity broadens the discussion. This is especially important in complex situations where the "right" answer is situational or hasn't been found yet. When you need to be innovative and brainstorm, you want to help others think outside the box.
Leaders have to have all the answers, right?
Kara had a coaching client who was facing a big org change and needed to keep her people motivated. She was hyper focused on what she should say and how she’d provide her people with answers. She knew this was a critical moment for building and maintaining trust and engagement on the team.
But when Kara asked, “What would you be looking for from your leader in a moment like this?” the client said, “For them to listen to me.”
Then why do we try to have all the answers? Why don’t we listen?
Sets you up as a collaborator, not a consultant
As a leader, there’s a place for both hats. There will be many moments when you should provide your insights and direct the path. But sometimes it’s valuable to be (and for others to perceive you as) a collaborator: someone who can challenge their thinking and help them discover their own solution. Curiosity is what makes you the person people want to think out loud with, not just the person they go to for answers.
Lets people find their own answers
The best “answer” isn’t necessarily the same for everyone. What works for you may not work for someone else. So instead of offering up what works for you, guide them to what will work for them through your curiosity. Besides, we act on the conclusions we make for ourselves; if you want people to take action, help them find their own answers.
Reveals less filtered information
When you lead with curiosity and allow space for others’ perspectives, people are less guarded. You get the unvarnished version. This is especially valuable in conflict, negotiation, or any situation where the surface story may not be the full one.
Curiosity as your leadership superpower
Once you start leading with curiosity, you’ll notice a few things:
- You’ll learn more about the people around you and what they value.
- You’ll be introduced to ideas or perspectives you wouldn’t have been able to come up with on your own.
- Others will appreciate the value of sitting down with you just to “think it through.”
If you're in a role where your expertise is your brand, this is the real challenge. You've earned the right to have opinions. The question is whether you reach for them reflexively or whether you make a choice about when they actually serve the person in front of you.
Managers are expected to have answers. But the leaders who create the most growth know when to step back and get curious instead.
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